So, a New Year is finally upon us and the fever of setting goals and New Year resolutions have set in. While typically, New Year goals might be more focused on your personal goals such as losing weight, making more money, and traveling around the world, relationship goals are often more overlooked.
We focus so much time on planning every other aspect of our lives and give the least planning to our relationship, yet we want to have the best relationships and crush many couple goals.
The truth of the matter is that we can’t have the best relationship or the most healthy relationships if we don’t plan for them. So this is your sign to start setting relationship goals too.
Setting goals as a couple is an excellent way to strengthen your bond, and create healthier relationships and stronger connections because the best relationships are those where both parties put effort! And how can you put in the effort if you’re not outlining the areas of your relationship that needs you to put in the effort.
Setting goals as a couple is one of the things I and my husband did to uplevel our relationship and it never remained the same. While we’re out there crushing our individual goals separately, we are also crushing our relationship goals together.
In this article, I’ll give you the top 10 relationship goals to set as a couple for the New Year.
Should You Have Goals As A Couple?
Yes, you should! Setting goals as a couple, be it short-term relationship goals or long-term relationship goals, is a great way to plan for the future together while making sure you’re also on the same page about certain important issues.
It will also help your relationship grow stronger, derive more happiness from it, and bring you guys closer.
Without further ado, let’s jump right into the top 10 relationship goals to set as a couple this new year:
1. Financial Goals
Setting goals about your finances with your partner is one of the smart goals for relationships you shouldn’t fail to set.
Talking about money with their partners is not something a lot of couples do as it takes a lot of trusts to get to that level and brings a level of vulnerability with it.
But if you can talk money with your spouse without being shy about it then you’re on the right track to building a healthy relationship.
When going over your finances or having a financial talk, you should talk about savings, budgets, and investments.
Discuss your saving plan and saving goals.
Are you keeping a joint savings account or an individual savings account?
Personally, I support having both savings accounts. My husband and I save for our family emergencies and tasks such as vacations, children’s tuition, and gifts together in our joint savings account, and then we each have a personal account where we meet our individual saving goals.
For budgeting, make a plan together and stick to it. Discuss how much you’re going to spend on your expenses and variables so that you both help each other stay in check.
A budgeting technique that my husband and I have been using over the years that is both simple and efficient is the “Bucket Budget” technique. I have made a sample here!
For investments, we both decide what we’re investing in, where we’re investing, and how much we’ll be investing. We do this quarterly as it’s easier to track our investment goals this way.
Money conflicts have been found to be among one of the highest causes of divorces and splitting of couples which is why more couples should be talking about this topic.
2. Regular Date Night – 52 Weeks Date Night Ideas Freebie
One of the relationship couple goals you should set this year is to keep dating your partner! After being together for a while couples tend to grow apart because they stop dating.
With the hustle and bustle of living, it is easy to forget to make our relationships a priority and when you add the distraction of technology to it, it becomes even harder to spend quality time with your spouse.
A remedy that I’ve found and that works for me over the years is to create a regular date night schedule at the beginning of the year with my husband and we stick to it. I found out that if you don’t carve out the time to intentionally go out on dates, you might end the year without actually going on one.
Going on dates can be as simple as staying in for a movie night or game night or even involving the outdoors like hiking, skiing, and surfing; you just have to decide if it’s monthly, weekly, or quarterly, whatever rocks your both.
For me, I prefer weekly date nights but we switch it up with quarterly or bi-annual travel vacations and I have a list of my best travel destinations as a couple.
Also, I have designed a freebie for you as a ‘New Year Gift’ – 52 Weeks Date Night Ideas For 2024. If you’re interested, do well to click the link below.
3. Fights Resolution
It is inevitable that you’ll fight in your relationships and have arguments but picking fights that are worth it and deciding how you resolve your fight will go a long way in preserving your relationship.
Having a fight resolution plan is not only a goal you set at the beginning of the year but one you should set at the beginning of your relationship.
When I was dating, fight resolution is one of the must-topics that I bring up with my partners. We discuss how we behave when we’re angry, our do’s and don’ts for when we’re angry, and how we’ll resolve it.
For example one of the rules I live by in all my relationships and now my marriage is to never go to bed angry after a fight.
No matter how angry I am or heated the argument was, I’ll never go to bed angry without resolving it, and this is what I and my husband have been practicing for over 10 years. We always talk about it before hitting the bed.
Another fight resolution that I have with my partner is our do’s and don’t. Whenever I’m angry in a heated argument and feel like I’ll soon boil over, I walk away. I’m walking not to avoid the confrontation (although I do that sometimes) but rather I’m walking away to avoid saying hurtful things because hurtful things said in anger can’t be taken back.
So, having a fights resolution plan is a healthy way to set healthy boundaries and goals for your relationship.
4. Open Communication Lines, Better Communication
One of the healthy relationship goals you should try setting this year is better communication. Having better communication with your partner is sure to make your relationship stronger.
Your partner isn’t a mind-reader so if there’s something bothering you, you should say it. If you don’t, it will lead to a buildup of resentment.
Also, there are a lot of topics that should be open for communication and you shouldn’t be afraid of bringing them up. With better communication lines, you can talk about your needs, your expectations for PDA, and even those unwanted ‘negative’ feelings such as jealousy that you might be having.
While having open and honest communication, you should also pay attention to non-verbal cues and listen more. Communication is a two-way street that involves not just talking but also listening.
Personally, I’d advise you to listen more than you talk because the more you listen, the more you hear that isn’t being said.
5. More Intimacy
The bedroom is often one of the most overlooked aspects when setting relationship goals but the truth is that it shouldn’t be so. Being compatible in the bedroom is more than just chemistry, communication plays a big part.
Like I said earlier, your partner isn’t a mind-reader so do well to communicate your needs. Tell him when he’s doing it well, men love compliments! And when he isn’t, gently communicate how you want it and where you want it.
The same should also go for your partner and you guys should be open to learning from each other. This will help you avoid common mistakes women make in bed.
Most times, when the spark fizzles out of your bedroom, it’s largely due to miscommunication. I remember a few years ago after my honeymoon when I started experiencing lackluster bedroom performance.
I thought our chemistry had ended with the honeymoon but all we needed was to speak and listen to each other while also spicing up our bedroom. You can try new toys, new positions, or my ultimate favorite, new locations (lol!).
6. Personal Development – Read Together
Relationship goals shouldn’t be all about romance and intimacy. Improving your personal development and making an impact on your partner’s life should also be important.
What are you adding to your partner’s life? How are you both improving? A couple that reads together stays together.
Whether or not you and your beau are bookworms, you should try reading together. It will serve as a stress reliever and create an avenue for more topics to discuss.
There are different books you can read ranging from personal development books, finance books, relationship books, or even your partner’s favorite book.
Reading your partner’s favorite book is a way to get to know them on a deeper level and what better way than to be engrossed with a story that touched their heart?
If you find it difficult to keep up with your reading goals, you can create a reading plan with each book for each month or week already picked out before time.
I do my monthly reading plan at the beginning of the year and while I might not necessarily have the title of the book I want to read for a particular month figured out, I already have the category I’ll be focusing on. So, whenever I get to that month, it’s easier.
For more book ideas, you can check out this list of relationship books you should read in 2024 for a stronger connection.
7. Travel Goals
For me, there’s no way better to celebrate a big win than to travel, seek new adventures, and gain new experiences so traveling always has a section in my goals because it serves as my reward system.
In all honesty, there’s nothing more romantic than visiting a new place with your partner. The change in scenery is always an intimacy booster and the new memories created will last a lifetime.
If you’re reading this, this is your sign to travel more this year. Hey, book that trip, the new adventure will be worth it! To help you make your decision faster, I have compiled the best romantic destinations you should visit.
8. Social Media Expectations
Your social media expectation is a subject that requires all candidness and for that has made it to my list of relationship goals to set this year.
When setting a social media expectation goal with your partner, you should take into consideration that as different as people are, so will their differences.
When setting this goal, you should talk about privacy, what is ok to make it to the internet concerning your relationship and what isn’t.
Some couples even go as far as having a couple’s social media accounts and discussing their expectations of one another on the internet.
For example, a college roommate of mine told her then-boyfriend “don’t comment on other females’ posts that aren’t our mutual friends, always like all my posts” and they even went as far as sharing passwords. Just do whatever rocks your boat but make sure you’re sticking to the rules too!
9. Career Goals
I know setting a career goal might be more of a personal goal but it can also be a relationship goal to set with your partner.
Setting your career goals with your partner gives you the accountability partner that setting it alone doesn’t. It will also build a base for your financial goals together, 5-year plans together, and whatnot.
My partner is my biggest cheerleader and I’m his so we always set our career goals together and do well to celebrate each other’s wins, small and big alike, we never miss any!
10. Personal Space
Even though you’re a couple in a relationship, you still need your personal space, personal time, and personal boundaries.
No matter how much you love your partner, you need your own space and time away from them, likewise, they too need their own “me time” away from you. This is vital for a relationship to remain healthy because even the most loving relationship can turn sour if you’re not allowed some time away from each other.
So this should make it to your couples goals for this year, determine how much “me time” you’d both need periodically, when you’re most likely to take it and even signs you need one that your partner can identify. This will lead to them understanding you better as they won’t see your “me time” as being selfish but rather necessary.
How Do You Plan Your Goals With Your Partner?
There isn’t a rulebook for how to plan your goals with your partner but from all my years planning our couples goals together with my husband, I’ve come up with the basics you need;
- Set time aside.
- Identify the areas of your life together as a couple you need planning for.
- Set the goals together for those areas identified with both of you contributing.
- The goals must follow the 3 golden rules: be specific (time-wise), be measurable, and at least one of the goals should be fun.
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